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Grateful.


Follow this plan and you’ll get your results. Follow these steps and you’ll be the way you desire. Do all the assignments this way and your grade will improve. Do it this way. Don’t do it that way. But I don’t feel it. But I’m hungry. But I want to go a different route. Your feelings are not trustworthy. Just do it this way and the right feeling will follow. But. But. Decades of denying one’s feelings are like a baby being denied care when it cries. Eventually the baby stops crying. The feelings stop communicating. The hunger doesn’t come. Slowing way down as a train coming to a stop, out of steam, not because it’s arrived at its destination. Always in those situations, God breaks thru with his kindness. The Enemy oppresses. But. God provides freedom. The Enemy reminds of failure. But. God provides a safe place to be weak. The Enemy tells lies. But. God tells truths about himself. The Enemy allows fear. But. God is big enough to push away the fear, a heavy blanket to provide comfort. In a way I am grateful for the oppression, failure, lies, and fear. It contrasts with His truth. Black and white, nothing in between. Grateful for the deep valleys as they contrast with the high peaks. In a deep valley one can only look up and see God. I am grateful not because it’s good for me. I don’t know what’s good for me because it been twisted by years of unknowing. But He shows me to be grateful as a response to his grace. It makes sense.


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